There is nothing notable about February 15 other than being the day after Valentine’s Day. However, while not being notable, the day after Valentine’s Day can bring us a mixture of emotions ranging from marvel to regret. Marvel at how we nailed our expression of love or regret for possibly missing the mark.
Regardless of whether our love is young or old, there are times when we wonder if we got it right. Did we choose the right flowers or place to eat to show our love as we intended? Possibly, we ask ourselves this question because we suspect we may not have!
Given the opportunity, we could tell stories of how past Valentine’s Days brought us a mixture of marvel and regret. For me, the marvel is that over 40 years ago, my wife said yes when I asked her to marry me! My regret is that my proposal was more of a whisper than a shout.
Like other less-than-confident males, my proposal, while heartfelt, failed to communicate the depth of my love. While on a walk, I gave her a card upon which I wrote my proposal. The day after, I wished I had made more of a romantic gesture to communicate my feelings. While the marvel was the yes to the proposal, the regret was how my true intent was not well communicated. Too often, it’s not until the day after that we see things clearly.
The bible tells many stories of “day-after” regret. We find it in Jesus’ parable of the Prodigal Son, David's sorrowful Psalm, and Saul's conversion on the Road to Damascus. In hindsight, each realized the error of their choices after their wake-up call.
The Prodigal Son’s regret came when, finding himself hungry after squandering the inheritance he had demanded from his father, we’re told he would have “eaten the corn-cobs in the pig slop, but no one would give him any.” (Luke 15:16) In that moment, realizing his error, he begins his journey back to his father intending to confess his sin and seek forgiveness.
Similarly, Psalm 51 tells of King David’s repentance following his adulterous relationship with Bathsheba. 2 Samuel tells of David’s lusting after Bathsheba and seducing her. Then, learning that she is pregnant, David arranges for her husband to be killed in battle. Later, when the Holy Spirit convicts David of his murderous, adulterous actions, he confesses, “For I am conscious of my rebellion, and my sin is always before me. Against you—you alone—I have sinned and done this evil in your sight. (Psalm 51:3–4a)
While our regrets the day after may not be as severe, they are nonetheless troubling. We ask, “What was I thinking? Why did I do that?” Sometimes, our regrets are due to our insecurities, as with my proposal; at other times, it is because of arrogance or self-importance. Regardless of why, seeing that the new day brings new opportunities will allow us to look to the future with hope.
Paul had such a redeeming experience when he was confronted by the Lord Jesus on the Road to Damascus. Paul and others began persecuting Christians shortly after Jesus’ death and resurrection. Paul later testified, “I used to believe that I ought to do everything I could to oppose the very name of Jesus the Nazarene. Indeed, I did just that in Jerusalem. Authorized by the leading priests, I caused many believers there to be sent to prison. And I cast my vote against them when they were condemned to death. Many times I had them punished in the synagogues to get them to curse Jesus. I was so violently opposed to them that I even chased them down in foreign cities.” (Acts 26:9–11)
With these past events in mind, Paul would later sum up the gospel of God’s grace saying, “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief.” (1 Timothy 1:15b) Because Paul was keenly aware of his unworthiness, his past regrets, the wonder of God’s grace was clear to him.
The day after, we must not allow the “if only’s” and “what if’s” to take root. Instead, we can remember that God’s grace is greater. God’s love enables us to not only live beyond our regrets, but embrace God’s grace knowing, “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). Knowing God the Father loves, us despite our sins, enables us to come to him just as the prodigal returned to his waiting father.
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